Monthly Archives: July 2009

New York, New York

I love it here. Even the things I hate I love. The place does have its own idiosyncrasies, though.

• Who are the cab drivers (who no longer help with luggage or know most directions) talking to constantly in foreign languages on their phones, without letup? Their stockbrokers?

• When you make a common task overly complex and elaborate, you don’t create elegance, you create pomposity. So it takes ten minutes to get coffee at the wonderful al fresco restaurant attached to the hotel, because it “Belgium-pressed,” or “Luxemburg-squeezed,” or something. (The waitress had asked, astonished, “You just want PLAIN coffee?”) The food, however, was terrific.

• Twice, the staff at the hotel was engaged in conversation as I approached and treated my appearance with some displeasure, as though an unwelcome solicitor had arrived. When I told the concierge to stop looking at me so suspiciously, she looked at me suspiciously.

• I’m meeting Omar for a cigar at 4 at the Grand Havana Room. My wife and daughter suggested, “As long as you’re going all the way uptown this afternoon, why not have your hair cut then instead of tomorrow morning.?” I didn’t realize I was traveling to another country, but the John Barret Salon was happy to accommodate me, and didn’t regard my phone call as an interruption in their day. (I have four degrees, which are apparently two shy of what’s required to understand the computer in my daughter’s new BMW. But we did manage to take the granddaughters over to see my mother in the nursing home in Jersey quite successfully!)

• They’ve turned an old elevated train track into a great pedestrian park and walkway. Below our window is a huge dog run. Every restaurant is filled, indoors and outdoors, in the evening. The one in this hotel, The Standard, serves until 4 am. The city that never sleeps. (What recession?)

• First class on the Acela was packed coming down here on a 3:50 train, but we arrived smack on time, with excellent service en route.

• The bellman, the front desk clerk, and the engineer who visited our room could not figure out what was wrong with the lights over our bed. They promised to repair the unit today, until, by accident, I found the master switch by the door. Three of the four walls are glass, floor to ceiling, so unless we draw the shears, the tub, sink, shower, and toilet (all in separate places) are exposed to lower New York!

How can you not love this town?

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved.

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Black Day for Faux Black Card

There is a near-mythical titanium card, usually called The Black Card, issued by invitation by American Express. Among the criteria for acceptance is an annual, minimum expenditure of $250,000. It’s actually titanium, and can’t be shredded (there is a pouch provided if you have to return it for any reason), and there is no limit on it. My wife and I used the service of a single call from Capri, Italy to reverse our entire trip and return home the next day when my daughter gave birth prematurely last September. The agent took care of every single need in 20 minutes, and left a message for us at DeGaulle Airport where we changed planes, that if we didn’t make our connection, she had a later flight also reserved, first class.

I tell you this because I’m receiving offers and reading ads for a Visa “black card.” It purports to have extra benefits and “status,” but it’s really a woeful derivative of Amex. If you’re going to try something, at least be original. When you have to leap on to a competitor’s coattails, it means you’re acknowledging that they’re better, got there first, and have a stronger brand.

A lesson for everyone: If you have to use the competition’s brand and signature approach, you’re just not good enough to compete in that arena. Therefore, I welcome Visa to the ranks of DASM.

(See the prior post here and how Visa could learn a lot from The Naval War College.)

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved.

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Naval War College Visit

My wife and I were guests for a private tour of the Naval War College today, arranged by Captain Mike Sherlock, who had read my earlier blog about my run-in with a Marine Colonel (http://www.contrarianconsulting.com/sir-no-sir/) during a conference in Newport. A lot of people make lemonade when handed lemons. The Navy, however, makes a gourmet meal.

John Edward Jackson gave us a background briefing, and then we met with Ambassador Mary Ann Peters, the Provost, and Admiral James Wisecup, the President. Everyone was gracious with their time and I’m sure they had a lot of other things do to. After that, we received what everyone regarded as the “five star” tour of the place by the noted historian John Hattendorf.

We were treated wonderfully, and as my wife pointed out, I was in my element, since I’ve studied naval history for quite some time. Reading an original letter from Thomas Jefferson (it’s pictured here) to John Paul Jones, suggesting a few things, was pretty phenomenal. The college is an unexpected farrago, with accredited, advanced degree programs as well as an appearance coming up by The Beach Boys! My background had been checked out, and John Jackson began the briefing by presenting me with a map of North Dakota. (An in-joke for those who read my bio.) When the admiral alluded to keeping tabs on Chinese naval developments, I was comforted that if they could track me, they could probably do pretty well with China.

This is the opposite of the DASM comments you’ll see elsewhere on here. The War College didn’t like the impression just one officer of over a thousand left with me, and moved to correct it. That’s not a bad philosophy for anyone who values the public opinion of their efforts.

The admiral left me with a commemorative coin, and told me that the tradition is, if we meet in a restaurant, whoever is not carrying the coin has to pay. No worries, admiral, the meal is on me. I’ve piloted a B-24, the Goodyear Blimp, and a steam locomotive. How hard could an aircraft carrier be? I’m available.


U.S. Naval War College, Newport, RI


Original letter from Thomas Jefferson to John Paul Jones


Original sextant of Commodore Matthew Perry


Gorgeous setting, musuem in the distance

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved. Go Navy!

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Posted in Peregrinations | 11 Comments

The Consultant’s Guide to Finding the True Buyer

I call the true buyer the “economic buyer.” He or she is that person who has budget or can find the money and can authorize a check. Low level people—as in HR and training—are paid to conserve budget. True buyers are paid to get results, and look at ROI, not costs.

Here are some good questions to ask (though not all at once!):

1. Whose budget will support this initiative?
2. Who can immediately approve this project?
3. To whom will people look for support, approval, and credibility?
4. Who controls the resources required to make this happen?
5. Who has initiated this request?
6. Who will claim responsibility for the results?
7. Who will be seen as the main sponsor and/or champion?
8. Do you have to seek anyone else’s approval?
9. Who will accept or reject proposals?
10. What is your decision making process for these initiatives?
11. If you and I were to shake hands, could I begin tomorrow?

Key Points: The larger the organization, the more the number of economic buyers. They need not be the CEO or owner, but must be able to authorize and produce payment. Committees are never economic buyers. If you are with a non-buyer, leverage the conversation to find the true buyer. Never allow yourself to become a peer of a non-buyer.

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Social Medea

That’s not a misprint in the title. Medea was best known as an enchantress.

As I’m wading through the mostly inane ramblings on Facebook (“I’m hiking,” “Tried a new cat food” (personally?), quotes from John Adams or Henry Winkler, or Soupy Sales, “Tommy scored 90% in ‘How Well Do You Know Your Own Rear End?’”), I am having these thoughts:

1. If you did not view or post on Facebook for, oh, one week, to what degree would your life be poorer? What would you have missed, and to what extent would you be less of a person, a professional, an object of interest? It it weren’t there, would it make a difference, or is it just occupying time, like a game show rerun?

2. If you were off Facebook for that week, and assuming you didn’t use the time to become a potted plant, what would you do with it to enrich your life? Would you interact more in person, or read another book, or learn a new skill, or pursue a hobby, or just think about your relationships and future, or play with the dog more? How much would that benefit you?

3. The people most vociferous about social media are clearly those who stand to gain by it, giving seminars, providing coaching, and somehow making money by encouraging use. It’s almost like a huge Ponzi scheme in some respects. I’m reminded of Y2K, or the guy with the pinky ring and Cadillac who rents the hotel room for a presentation to get you to buy soap suds and “recruit new members.”

4. People actually talk about “monetizing” presence on social platforms. See point #3. Even the people who OWN Twitter, for example, aren’t making money from it! If someone can find a way to get me 50 cents from each of the 4 million people connected to me on linkedin, I’ll split it with you!

5. There are examples of just abominable taste, not merely because some oafs feel free to use obscenity or scatological references (for some reason, more women than men), but because they are oblivious to the fact that they are at a virtual public gathering and they think there’s nothing wrong with it. These must be the same people who curse out loud on airplanes and spit on sidewalks and talk back to movie screens.

6. You can start some serious conversations on Facebook and elsewhere, but they peter out. Moreover, the amount of postings that have NO responses, NO commentaries, is huge, meaning that, well, perhaps no one among your “friends” cares! It’s all about personal “air time” and being heard and seen without having to be interesting, be helpful, or have ideas.

7. When you challenge any aspect of the social platforms or act in a non-conformist way (e.g., I don’t “follow” anyone on Twitter, though I have 700 followers) you get angry ripostes from the self-appointed owners of the secret decoder rings. They want to give you etiquette lessons. How can there be etiquette standards in what is, for all intents and purposes, a social free-for-all where most people don’t care how they use the cutlery?!

I’m yanking chains here to have some fun (I don’t believe you can easily debunk something you’re not part of), but there is a fundamental truth that people will have to come to grips with. These sites are huge time dumps IF you allow them to be. They don’t “amplify” anyone’s message because they “amplify” ALL messages, meaning the cacophony is so intense that nothing stands out. The exceptions claiming business gains—I’m talking making money, not making “contacts”—are rare and, frankly, I don’t believe most of them.

But the key question, outside of spending a few minutes a day on this stuff is: Am I better off, is my life enriched by the hours I spend on virtual social platforms each week, or is there something I’m not getting to, something I’m avoiding, something detracting from my growth?

The articles are starting to appear debunking the entire scene, which is a predictable cycle. There are claims that Twitter has only a 40% retention rate, for instance (Nielsen Online). I think in a year we’ll see some kind of vast combination and amalgamation which might just make all this more practical and fulfilling. But with rare exception, right now, it’s like chewing air.

Beware the siren call.

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved.

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Posted in King of Social Media | 35 Comments

You Are In Good Hands And Secured

Amtrak security hard at work between luggage and a hard place. Lot of papers there yet to go through. Photo taken midway between Providence and New York.

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Sylva Leduc Interviews Alan Weiss

Sylva Leduc of Sage Leaders, conducts this interview on behalf of the Arizona Chapter of the Institute of Management Consultants. In this podcast you will learn about: The origins, rational, and implementation for value based fees, self esteem, the accelerant curve, social networking, web sites, podcasts, videos, what should a starting consultant do to improve their business? writing proposals, finding the buyer, press kit, best industries to exploit, innovation, determining the value of a project and much more.

and now also on iTunes

Click Here for entire podcast series table of contents

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Do I Have Some Standards for You

What do you think is the proper etiquette regarding following people on Twitter? What is Anal Insistence and how may it possibly relate to you? Where could you get a response hygiene lesson? What do you call great people? Want to hear the answers? then listen to Alan outline some standards for you to follow. And oh yes, you need to listen to this, yes you, I am talking to you!

and now also on iTunes

Click Here for entire podcast series table of contents

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Posted in Podcast Series: The Way I See It | 2 Comments

Cigar Peg Offer to Alan’s Community Members

The Cigar PEG’s December 2009 Key West, Florida Advanced Speaker Event

Special offer to members of my communities: If you’re interested in attending (proceeds go to charity), send an email to Ed Rigsbee at ed@cigarpeg.com and he will send you a special invitation to apply. I am keynoting and Randy Gage and Ford Saeks are leading the next two days. I’ll also be there for two social events. Only 25 people are being admitted.

Why: Advanced professional speakers and other professionals need a place where they can challenge, and be challenged, at levels commensurate with their stature within their perspective industries. Experienced professionals need more that to simply mentor newcomers at an industry event, but rather to enjoy social and professional interaction with true peers.

Vision: In a relaxed atmosphere, professional speakers and content experts can learn, teach, and interact. A different kind of environment is necessary to foster collaboration, expression, and implementation. Most senior professionals already know more than they use, putting ideas into definitive action is the call to arms in Key West. The person that attends this event is the person that truly desires to stand out in the marketplace. The Cigar PEG offers the well known; work hard, play hard, and break the rules style in a business building gathering—it is not for the faint of heart but for those that want intense focus.

Who: This event is invitation only, controlled by mail-in registration. The event will have hand-picked speakers and other professionals in attendance, improving the quality of in, and out of, meeting discussions.

When: December 2-4, 2009 with an opening evening event on December 1.

Pricing: Registration is $2,500. For those that select to stay at the event hotel and help with the total cost of the event, there will be a $1,000 rebate following the event. To qualify for the rebate, an attendee will need to book a sleeping room, within the Cigar PEG block for a minimum of four (4) nights. The reason for this is simply financial. The real cost of the meeting includes a presidential suite, meeting room, some meals, and other less noticeable costs. Because the Cigar PEG’s standard method of operation is to offer a hospitality suite and other amenities, attendees’ stay at the event hotel is factored into the total event. Attendees are welcome to stay at a cut-rate property elsewhere on Key West; however they still have to participate financially in the total cost and therefore will not receive a rebate following the event.

Event Goals:
a) In depth and cutting-edge information that encourages attendees to explore deep, improving take-away implementation strategies and tactics.
b) Unique social environment that encourages attendee interaction with presenters and other participants; helping to answer specific questions and resolve individual needs through small group meals, around the pool, and over drinks in the hospitality suite.
c) Hand-picked group of successful individuals interested in advancing both their businesses and personal lives.
d) Hell of a good time, casual and fun; but purposeful environment will allow connections that will stimulate ideas and make implementation even easier.

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Adventures in DASM*

* My book “Our Emperors Have No Clothes” had a working title of “Dumb Ass Stupid Management,” which the publisher was too chicken to use.

*****
A firm named JL Powell started sending me expensive, hard copy catalogs out of the blue. I’m assuming they purchased some special lists. Their casual clothing is expensive, e.g., $230 for a pair of deck shoes.

The first time I ordered, I was told one item couldn’t be shipped for two weeks. It finally took three. The second time I ordered, a few days ago, I received an email back several hours later telling me my order was cancelled because the item was no longer available. This from a new catalog I had received that day.

There will be no third time I order. When I sent an email requesting my name be taken off all lists, an actual human being wrote back to tell me she’s happy to do so—no questions about why, or my experiences, or my interests.

Now, this company is spending major bucks on advertising and promotion. I had never heard of them and I am squarely, apparently, in their demographic target. After making the investment, successfully finding me, AND enticing two orders, they are now on my black list, and I’m inaugurating them here into DASM. (By comparison, the general manager of Bergdorf Goodman in New York called me personally this morning about a problem I was having there.)

Marketing has these elements:
1. Identifying value
2. Identifying targets for that value
3. Successfully attracting those targets
4. Converting the attraction in to a purchase
5. Sustaining the purchase into loyalty, repeat business, and referrals

If you stop after point 3, you might as well do what a friend of mine did in the Mirage Casino in Las Vegas: He handed his money to the dealer, but refused the chips the dealer assembled. “Let’s just cut out the middle stuff,” he said, “and you just keep it all.”

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved.

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