Alan’s Winter Olympic Moments (sponsorship for this spot available)

• Whoever thought the US skaters were losing because of their outfits? I thought they simply weren’t skating as fast as the other people.

• The winter Olympics was once about skiing downhill and skating across ice. Now it’s a white X-games. If it weren’t for all the bizarre, modern events, the US would have fewer medals than Egypt.

• Can we just leave Matt Lauer over there?

• The biggest competition near if not on the ice is between Scott Hamilton and whoever his female analyst partner is, trying to outdo each other as experts, competing for air time, adjectives, and the overwrought world cup of figure skating announcing.

• Former Olympians generally make awful commentators, even if they do clean up well. Tara Lipinski?

• Who on earth decides they’re going to train for the skeleton and compete in a downhill dive on a crate they can’t control with their chin two inches off the ice?

• I’m sure Putin will have some weather people killed because of the warm temperatures.

• The NBC staff solely assigned to barrista duty at its private Starbucks within its compound is larger than 57 of the Olympic teams (source: Wall Street Journal).

• NBC’s rating are lower than Vancouver and I doubt it’s because they can’t cover as much “live” due to time changes. The Russians are humorless compared to the Canadians (or anyone else), the events are dull, no one cares about Norway’s medals, and the announcing is lackluster. Watching people ski on what appears to be oatmeal is not my idea of time well invested.

• I realize they need the money, but athletes who look like highway billboards don’t light my fire.

• I loved the American downhiller who, asked why he finished eighth when expected to medal, smiled and said, “A big choke, man.” I’d hire that kind of confidence and candor in a minute.

© Alan Weiss 2014

4 thoughts on “Alan’s Winter Olympic Moments (sponsorship for this spot available)

  1. Well, here in The Netherlands were are suffering from “Orange Fever”: we keep on winning medals at speed skating. New record! So, we think that we having great Olympics. Did you know that Putin greeted just 2 Dutch speedskaters, who happened to be the only gay members of the Dutch Olympc team? Now, isn’t that funny?

    Were are a bit sorry for Shani, who is well know and respected back here.

    • You folks are doing great. I was disappointed that the US blamed the uniforms, rather than compliment the winners. The US is doing quite well, although our TV coverage is dreadfully done by NBC, and we should have another gold medal in excuses.

  2. -If the US dominated Speed Skating like the Dutch the IOC would cancel the sport as fast as it did to baseball and softball.

    -All of these “new” events might not go over will with the over 60 crowd, but it only attracts the biggest crowds and gets on prime time tv…so it is not going anywhere.

    -Russia just failed to medal in Ice Hockey, this is like the US failing to medal at Basketball.

    -If Scotland votes to leave the UK in September, Great Britain will need to replace the whole Curling Team…they and a large part of the Winter Games team is Scottish.

    -10% of of the US Olympic Team comes form just one college in Utah.

    -The winner of the Winter Games is Tara Lipinski and Johnny Weir… and they are not even competing.

    -Norway just dedicated a statue to their legendary biathlon hero. I will not be holding my breath for a statue of the great Bonnie Blair in the US.

    -The Canadian ice dancing team is complaining that their coach did not give them enough attention and gave it to the US Team who won the gold. Should you not have addressed that BEFORE you got to the Games??

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