Category Archives: King of Social Media

Marshall Mellow

My doctor performed my semi-annual colonoscopy today (photo below) and I volunteered for it to be filmed by the local television cable show, Waste Matters. I’m ecstatic to be a part of health and the media.

Troy Molloy

Pictured are me and my three sons who all attended the annual Climb A Hill Slowly event in Prairie Dog, South Dakota. It’s about a 20-minute walk and the point isn’t to win but to participate. Everyone received a gold medal, but if you look closely ours has “with honors” on them because we climbed with helmets.

Gina Whiz

Changed her profile shot by taking off her sunglasses.

• 115 people like this

• Don Wrong: “Wow, I only fantasized about your eyes before!”

• Chip Dale: “What Don said.”

• Ace Whitt: You must eat like a bird!

Swiss Tyrol

Varga estoppen verst lichten appamatox verboten oy vey sur quoi ce imprimatur.

• Charlotte Russe: Ump ter vector!

• Saint Bernard: Laughing!

Nichole Napp

Sitting at home doing absolutely nothing. Well, I am typing this. But once I’m done, I’ll be doing absolutely nothing. Like now. Almost.

• 2,498 people like this

• Rory Dory: I’m going to do that!

• Mrs. Rory Dory: Oh, no you’re not!

• Saint Bernard: Laughing!

Kenny Radar

Just figured out my new Nikon DZ4000.6a camera. Wow! Photo below is of my wall.

• Lupo Valez: What setting did you use?

Jackie Rusty Baby O’Reilly

Just thinking about “Day and night, you are the one. Only you beneath the moon and under the sun.”

• Justin Pinkney: Wow! You ought to right muzic. I don’t know if those exzact lyrics would work, but the rime sounds good. Nice #%%^&$ job!

• Bland Pastel: Too late, I’m pretty sure Justin Beiber wrote that.

• Charlotte Russe: Ump ter vector!

Prince Earl

Here I am after my fourth, iron-person 400-mile run, 1,000 kilometer  bike ride, and 65-fathom ocean dive. I can’t wait to compete in Nepal.

• Horst Rider: Unbelievable! And you aren’t even perspiring!

Clair Blair

Something for all of us to remember:

“It’s not how often you compliment a friend or forgive a child, but rather that you befriend yourself and treat yourself like a child so that you never are entrapped by that inner adult. This is to have lived.”

• 45,976 people like this

Dolly Bolly

Here are the remnants of my mother’s 60^th birthday cake. I think you can see what kind of great time we had.

• Roger Andout: Wish I was there!

• Carey Knot: I wish my mom was 60!

• Rich Crisp: That looks like agar 47 dye on the candles, and that is toxic to toads. I’d be careful about how you dispose of that.

• Lupo Valez: What setting did you use?

• Saint Bernard: Laughing!

© Alan Weiss 2013

I just spent a record ten consecutive minutes on Facebook, because people were commenting on my new photo with my dogs and Colleen Francis had posted some interesting stuff.

As I wandered around, I noticed a new “fad” (beyond those bizarre women who keep posting new “glam shots” to get “liked” by the same 13 guys who tell them they look good every time): People are posting testimonials and compliments they’ve purportedly received! They are applauding themselves!

“Here’s what the Association of Rodeo Clowns said about me: ‘He’s the best we’ve ever had at walking onto the stage from the right.’” And many mention some complete unknown with whom they’ve “shared a stage”: “Here is Nutso Ponzi, the famed ‘Get Rich Eating Cereal’ guru whom I had the luxury of following at the National Ergot Convention.”

I’m sorry, but someone has to start selling “How to Get A Life” because Facebook apparently sucks the life out of you.

Do you hear that? It’s the sound of one hand clapping.

© Alan Weiss 2013

Once every two weeks I soar through Facebook in the off chance someone has published something wittier than a Hallmark card and to see new photos of my grandchildren (whom I see every other day or so anyhow).

It’s worse than an SNL sketch: Half-way down the page, when I had to run to find liquor, I had already unearthed these two postings:

1. It’s official! Drum roll! I have the flu!

2. I’m writing a new book on adult acne and I’m looking for exciting case studies.

(I am not making this up.)

Too bad there is no such thing as a “social media marketing expert” to help us here. (If you threw a rock down the street in Duluth you’d hit five of them.)

It’s after 5 pm somewhere, right?

© Alan Weiss 2013

Here is the link for the report I mentioned earlier today on the minimal influence of social media on online holiday purchasing: http://ow.ly/4OWUY #GSIchat

(Note: An interesting piece of correspondence from one of my colleagues in Australia. I’ll publish the actual report once I make sure it’s permissible to do so.)

Alan, I thought you might be interested in this report I just ran across being advertised on an Australian Small Business site. It looks at the US retail sector—last year’s data—mapping purchasing “paths” for online purchasing.

The analysis indicates that even in the online retail space, social media were correlated with less than 2% of online purchases over the US holiday periods in Q4 of 2010. That is, social media as yet has very little impact on people’s buying.

As you have said many times, social media have very little impact on true economic buyers for consulting services. Granted this study is strictly for online purchases but if, as this study indicates, social media currently have so little influence on purchasing patterns of those who are deliberately looking for retail products on the internet, how much “truer” is it for consultants offering high value services?

I “wonder” how social media gurus would respond?

Regards,

Peter McLean

Managing Director

Lamplighter

Today I was notified that I had my thousandth friend on Facebook. What is the proper etiquette? Do I buy them all gifts or throw a party? Or should they each send me $100?

I post something of marketing value on Twitter every morning. Yesterday, I received this:

Alan,

Yesterday, you posted this on Twitter, http://twitter.com/BentleyGTCSpeed/status/15856333967:
“Would you spend this? No! Would you invest this for X return? Yes! Watch your language.”

I used it immediately…

“Would you spend $120,000 ($20,000 per month over six months) to receive $800,000 worth of advertising/publicity for your product? And If we don’t hit that number, month seven is on the house!”

…and it worked immediately. I’m now meeting with the CEO next week. Great tip!

Thank you for sharing.

Jason Mudd, APR