Contrarian Consulting

The Adventures of Koufax and Buddy Beagle

Posted on May 17, 2013 by Alan Weiss

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Andiamo Domani

Posted on May 16, 2013 by Alan Weiss

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As a public service, and with deep respect for my British colleagues, I’ve decided to reveal the results of my research on why the British take so long. We know it’s not because they are excessively outgoing, or slap-the-knee humorous. Fortunately, I’ve narrowed it down to two factors:

1. The rhetorical question. The British have a strange habit of asking a non-question, an interrogative cul-de-sac. For example, they will say, “It’s a cloudy day, isn’t it?” Now, is that a request for a comment, or simply for agreement, or is silence expected? Or is it sarcastic, as in a New Yorker’s, “Nice day!”? Do they sincerely want an answer? I don’t know, because the conversation goes like this:

“We’re in a bit of a spot, aren’t we? The traffic seems tied up for miles, doesn’t it? There’s a chance we’ll be late, won’t we? We could take the Standwith Circle Circus Rotary, couldn’t we?”

I just don’t know. Should I respond? (That was a real question.) It’s like talking to someone with hiccups. You just don’t know when to squeeze in a comment. It takes so long.

2. Addresses. Here’s the address of the last package I mailed to GreatBritain: 43 Foulward, The Baskings, Hastings on Tweed, 44 Donnelly (Near Gladstone), Pluxbury Gardens, Level 4, Flat 3, 130 Cobblestone Chuck. This is why it takes so long. Imagine making out Christmas cards, or a spread sheet of contacts. The British seem to want to capture every historical nuance in current names. (In London, there are two Tate Museums. Perhaps they’ve run out of names.)

This follows my research on why the Irish take so long, which is due to only one reason: They begin every sentence or question with: “After 800 years of British oppression….”

(Hail Britannia)

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Leader or Follower?

Posted on May 16, 2013 by Alan Weiss

There are three main elements in a healthy consulting business:

Eliciting and following up on leads.

You must make your way to a genuine, economic buyer, in an organization that can truly use your value. In your “pipeline,” leads should be continually entering at various stages, from short-term to long-term. Too many consultants “vacuum” out the leads and don’t replace them, with the result of spurts of intense business and then famine for even longer periods.

2. Conversion of leads to business.

You must develop a trusting relationship with the economic buyer to the point where the buyer shares professional and personal goals, and the objectives for and value of a project. Too many consultants rush this stage as if it’s a checklist to hurry through. As a result, the buyer says positive things to get you out of the office, but doesn’t call back or respond to the proposal.

3. Implementation and delivery.

You must provide a speedy and high quality improvement to the client’s condition. This should be as non-labor intensive as possible yet still meet all objectives. Too many consultants fall in love with their methodology or, worse, engage in “scope seep” and continue to deliver unnecessary value to try to validate themselves and their fees.

If you are perceived as an expert and thought leader, true buyers come to you, enter into business on your terms and for your fees, and never question the process. Do you want to be another pair of “feet on the street” or a true leader in this profession?

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May 15 Deadline for Alan Weiss’s Common Sense World View Video Series 1/3 Discount

Posted on May 14, 2013 by Alan Weiss

Tomorrow (May 15) at 5 eastern US time is the deadline for the one-third discount on the weekly Alan Weiss’s Common Sense World View Video Series, which starts in June. No exceptions on that great offer of personal and professional sophistication for a few bucks a week!

http://www.summitconsulting.com/seminars/Alans-Common-Sense-World-View.php

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Alan’s Monday Morning Memo – 5/13/13

Posted on May 13, 2013 by Alan Weiss

May 13, 2013—Issue #190

This week’s focus point: I don’t believe others intimidate us. I believe we allow ourselves to be intimidated through self-limiting beliefs and lack of self-worth. My experience in board rooms is that there is present the same insecurities, emotionalism, turf battles, uncertainties, and poor judgment that exists on the factory floor or in the sales force. They are just playing with higher amounts of money (that’s not their own). Titles and position do not create character, only business cards. I’ve met professors so bigoted that they are pathetic, and CEOs so vacillating that I want to shout, “DECIDE!!” Generally, the more initials after one’s name, the more suspicious I get. We are all individuals of worth and value to others if we choose to be, and once we act that way we can stand toe-to-toe with anyone. In fact, often that’s the only position from which we can be of real help.

Monday Morning Perspective: We’re not in this to test the waters, we are in this to make waves. — Unknown

May 15 World View Deadline: Only two days left to subscribe to Alan Weiss’s Common Sense® World View Weekly Video with one-third off, a few bucks a week, for five minutes of insights about life, business, global affairs, economic trends, and relationships. Sample videos and registration: http://www.summitconsulting.com/seminars/Alans-Common-Sense-World-View.php

Special Teleconference: The Geometry of the Sale: How to get in front of buyers and convert business–the right angle. One time only, free download, free one-hour audio “In the Buyers Office: A Case Study,” and “101 Sales Questions for Any Situation” if you sign up before May 20: http://summitconsulting.com/seminars/HowToGetInFrontOfBuyers.php

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Don’t Bite When It’s Not Necessary

Posted on May 13, 2013 by Alan Weiss

Bentley has a bite pressure of approximately 300 pounds, more than a pit bull, less than a Great White Shark (600 pounds). Of the canids, the wolf hits about 400.

I report this because Bentley (and Buddy Beagle) will play by gently nipping my fingers and hand, even though they could take a finger off rather easily. This is called the “puppy bite,” meaning that, when raised in a litter, puppies learn to play and not harm their siblings. (Dogs raised outside of a litter often do not practice that distinction and can hurt you inadvertently.)

We all need to learn the difference between productive play and self-defense and aggression. Not all disagreements need be fights, not all fights need be fatal. Sometimes in matters of principle (to paraphrase Jefferson) we need to take a stand. But in matters of taste, is it really all that important?

Bentley doesn’t care which ball we use to play fetch, nor when he goes into the yard. But he would defend us viciously and dangerously against an intruder or threat.

He learned this early, and so should we all. Proportional response is a great gift.

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Head Games

Posted on May 13, 2013 by Alan Weiss

I’m neither a big golf fan nor a big Tiger Woods fan, but yesterday the TV was on in the background and this time of year there’s very little of interest on a late Sunday afternoon before cable series kick in. I do find interesting how golfers perform under pressure, since it seems that they are particularly vulnerable to “head games” as the final round is played and final holes draw near, despite thousands of hours of practice.

Sergio Garcia was tied for the lead with Tiger Woods until he put two balls into the water on the next to last hole, and one in the water on the final hole, dropping six shots back in just two holes. (Earlier in the tournament, he had complained that Woods, as his playing partner, deliberately distracted him on a shot. Why golfers need crypt-like silence to swing a stick at a ball I’ll never know.) Garcia has never won a major, and has never lived up to the potential most people believed he possesses.

Woods played extremely well, won by two strokes in a tight field, and seemed to relish the pressure. I believe he’s won four tournaments faster this year than any other, and he’s only a handful behind Snead’s record (I think that’s what Warner Wolf said this morning on Imus.) He a fearsome competitor, and is what they call in sports a “money player.” (And even he was clearly distracted during his famous marital problems and infidelity.)

Some of us cave under pressure, some of use find it nutritional. It’s a shame to get in front of a buyer and then fall apart, or to walk out on a stage and draw a blank. No one is shooting at us. Golfers walk on manicured lawns in the sun trying to win millions. We all have to put things in perspective.

Some people have legitimate, dramatic issues of health, family, and relationships. Most of us are trying to convey value, help people, and be paid for it. That’s our walk in the park.

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Shell and Citi: Dumb Ass Stupid Management Hall of Fame

Posted on May 12, 2013 by Alan Weiss

I’ve previously cited Shell Oil here as an outstanding representative of DASM (http://www.contrarianconsulting.com/dasm-shell-game/). It turns out their credit card operation is run by Citi.

Some assistant minion in the president’s office offered me $100 of Shell credit if I would consider remaining a customer. I said I would if my credit limit were raised from the $600 that was established 30 years ago, and if they’d stop suspending my card for fraudulent suspicion every time my son used it in California, where he’s lived for over a year and which they know.

Yesterday, the minion informed me that they’d be happy to have me back. BUT, my card was cancelled, so I’d have to reapply online and–you won’t believe this–since my card was flagged for possible fraud in the past, it probably would be again in the future (even though it was their dumb error).

So, adieu to Shell and Citi and the oafs who run these organizations. I was a 30-year customer and have a spotless credit rating, but they’re not into customer retention, they’re into squeezing profits and CYA. So, I repeat, you ought to stay away from organizations that want to take your money and give you the business, instead of provide value and earn your business.

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