Words I’ve Never Used in Certain Combinations

• I think I’ll just run a vacuum.

• Let me stop and get directions because I’m sure I’m lost.

• A Victoria’s Secret show, no, I have a bowling night.

• Am I driving over the speed limit?

• This sushi is moving so I’d better eat that first.

• Who can get me tickets to a Justin Beiber concert?

• The shirt is a little wrinkled, maybe I should iron it.

• Well, it would be a cocktail or wine, but not both.

• I’ll have the steak well done, please.

• I’ll vote for anyone who’s committed to raising taxes.

• I’m sorry I’ve missed a Tony Robbins’ workshop at this stage of my life.

• I think it’s time to paint the garage.

• Can’t the family stay longer over the holidays?

• First class is just a waste of money, what’s the cheapest ticket available?

• It sounds like the dog vomited in the living room, I ought to go see if I have to clean it up.

• It’s a great experience to be out here cutting the grass myself.

• What channel is roller derby on?

• My goal in life is to read all of James Patterson’s books.

• The remote control is only a few feet away, I’ll get up and get it so I don’t inconvenience anyone else.

• What’s your least expensive wine?

• I have to check my Klout score today.

• I don’t mind sitting in the last row, the view is fine from any seat, right?

© Alan Weiss 2013


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