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Alan’s Motivational Achievement Wall Poster

Alan’s Motivational Achievement Wall Poster

Alan’s Motivational Achievement Wall Poster

Adversity
When it occurs, it temporarily justifies all the whining you’ve been doing all along.

Boldness
What you observe in others until they fail, whereupon you say, “I told you so.”

Career
Usually ignored by people, who keep allowing their jobs to get in the way.

Daring
See “boldness.”

Excellence
A beautifully nebulous term which implies vast improvement without demanding a metric, standard, or completion. See also “great,” as in “Good to….”

Flexibility
That trait utilized by people who want to justify turning left while signaling right.

Great
A vague sense of high performance somewhat akin to “happy” in it’s clarity, except happiness is more measurable and tangible.

Honesty
When used in it’s adverbial form to begin a sentence, a sure sign that what follows is persiflage, lies, and bunkum, as in, “Honestly, I think your ideas are wonderful….”

Innovation
That quality, above all others, most publicly proclaimed as needed by major organizations, and most brutally beaten down, punished, and eradicated.

Job
A relatively unimportant and temporary condition usually associated with task instead of result, which gets in the way of a career. See “career.”

Keynote
A speech given with the intent of conveying a theme and attitude which will not only be abandoned quickly after the conference, but may not even last until the coffee break.

Leadership
An endangered species on the verge of extinction, and already totally absent from the airline, newspaper, auto, and financial services industries. Oxymoron example: The leadership requires a bailout.

Money
Generally confused with wealth, which is the amount of discretionary time one has, and for which money is merely fuel. (The mindless pursuit of money can actually erode wealth. You can always make another dollar, but you can’t make another minute.)

New
See “originality.”

Originality
See “innovation.”

Pride
That which organizations call on for and bestow upon employees in lieu of raises, better benefits, and job security.

Quality
That anal-retentive search for perfection as characterized by bizarre references to martial arts or obscure Asian phrases, which supercedes actual performance in real time. (My personal favorite: A division president with his top staff on a parade through the plant, examining endless charts and graphs at every work station, while a machine leaked oil, untended, onto the floor right behind them, with no one noticing. I wanted to point it out but lacked my Kaizoo secret decoder ring, and could not communicate.)

Resilience
The capacity to absorb negative feedback like a deep sea sponge and/or hit your head against a stone wall repeatedly, like a demented ram. Example: “He must have great resilience to have weathered all those failures and catastrophes.”

Security
That which accrues to those who keep the lowest profile and do not engage in innovation. See “innovation.”

Time
A priority, not a resource, as in, “Honestly, I wish I had the time to see my kid’s soccer game but I don’t.” Of course you have the time, but you’ve assigned it to a higher priority in your universe.

Uplifting
A phrase often applied to a vacuous and insipid motivational speech which usually involves patriotic music, videos of outstanding athletes, and stories of unimaginable adversity undergone by a speaker who cries exactly 27 minutes into the talk, and whose Mercedes is parked down the block.

Victory
A temporary improvement in condition, never final and seldom fatal, and relatively as long lived as the roller coaster’s pause at the top of the first hill.

Wealth
Discretionary time. The wealthiest people are those able to use their time in whatever ways they choose. See “time” and “money.”

Xerox
A former brand name now used as a generic for the equipment which provides for the mass distribution of résumés, pornographic stories, and photocopies of various human body parts.

Yes Person
The politically correct term for someone with “resilience.” See “resilience.”

Zest
The spice of life, available only to those who work for themselves.

© Alan Weiss 2009. All rights reserved.

Written by

Alan Weiss is a consultant, speaker, and author of over 60 books. His consulting firm, Summit Consulting Group, Inc., has attracted clients from over 500 leading organizations around the world.

Comments: 9

  • Christina Dyer

    January 17, 2009

    I just want to know how long it took you to write this. My favorite is “uplifting”. Thanks for making me laugh out loud!

  • Jeffrey Summers

    January 19, 2009

    I love it. But when are we going to get “Alan’s Greatest Quotes”?

  • Graham Franklin

    January 19, 2009

    This will make me chuckle for many months. The sad part is it fits so much that is currently going on in the UK

  • Christina

    January 23, 2009

    My all time favorites were directed at me…

    1. Get the straw out of your teeth and get out of the cornfield! and,
    2. Big fish die in small ponds…
    Both were aimed at getting me out of my small town. Helpful?
    The For Sale sign has been in the yard for 7 months…nice time to try and sell!

  • Wayne Botha

    January 23, 2009

    Hi Jeffrey,

    Why not help build the list of Alan’s greatest words which have helped us? If we all contribute, then the resulting list will be worth gold.

    1. When you are 80% done, then move. The final 20% is dysfunctional.
    2. Aim for success, not perfection.
    3. Tell the audience what they need to know not everything that you know.
    4. Talk the walk
    5. Wealth is discretionary time.

    Which quotes have helped you the most?

  • Wayne Botha

    January 23, 2009

    More that come to mind:

    1. You can always make more money, you can’t make more time.
    2. Be bolder.
    3. Unsolicited feedback is for the benefit of the sender.
    4. Give three options. Change the question from “Should we do business?”, to “How should we do business?”
    5. What’s your point?

  • Jeffrey Summers

    January 24, 2009

    I will do that. Email me your favorite Alan quotes and I will gather them and send everyone a PDF of the finished product.

    Good start here!

  • Chad Barr - Alan's Blog Implementer & Moderator

    January 24, 2009

    Thank you all for the great idea. You have convinced us to create this new thread: http://www.contrarianconsulting.com/alanism-the-evolving-collection-of-alan%E2%80%99s-apothegms/

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